Sometimes I really wonder if I am good enough to be here. Sure sometimes I can make a good call or get to do cool stuff, but at the end of the day its whether my exams are passed and I can memorise tables and tables of diseases and parasites.
That is what I have been doing the past few days I have been studying for my exams and so have been living, sleeping and breathing books. However for everything that goes in it feels like 10 things are forgotten. Looking at what I need to memorise I feel that it is an impossible task.
Though I want to specialise in surgery I still need to qualify as a vet to get there, and was reminded of this fact by a very good friend the other day. The problem with being a vet student is there is so much to learn, and though each time I step into surgery I learn something it tends to be random with no structure. However surgery is easy to learn as everything makes sense, and I can see it within my head so can see what needs to happen and how. Sadly this is not always the case as with diseases and parasites you need to memorise stuff you may, or may not see at some point in practice. So until my exams are complete I am stepping out of surgery unless there is something really special or I get called in on an emergency.
I guess the only thing I can do here is to spend as much time as I can studying, and then hope that when I get to the exam I actually remember something. I am nervous, stressed and scared that I won’t pass, I really don’t want to fail. So now I am going back to study. I’ve got just over 30 hours until the first exam.